herthoughtscaptiveart

Sometimes we cannot comprehend what happens and trying to make sense of it just makes us more confused. For nearly a decade, I have been trying to wrap my head around something that has left me at times in the unknown. I wonder, “is this a sign from God or is it just something that is all caught up in my head?” It is very hard to tell if something is sometimes a God sign or just our imagination making up scenarios to try and fixate on what we want.

Not knowing the outcome is very hard to accept but stressing yourself out only makes matters worse. I cannot control what God wants for me; all I can do is pray that whatever ends up happening will always trump what I want for myself and His promising plan. God gives us chance after chance to make the right decision and since we are all sinners, we fall short of the glory of God. Each time that I try to shift His plan, I end up in a downward spiral, and it creates chaotic environments around me. This ends up affecting my relationship with the Lord and my overall mental health. We cannot doubt God and what He does for each of us because everybody’s’ circumstances are different since we are all made uniquely in His image.

It is okay to let go sometimes even when you feel like holding on still. This situation that I have been wrestling with for the past decade, comes and goes randomly. I try not to dwell on it, but it does carry over since it has been a large part of my life growing up from my teens to my current state of being in my late 20’s. Some people would never understand because they do not walk the same path as me in life. Lightly putting it, everyone has a different journey, and no one knows what you deal with or go through on a day-to-day basis.

Keep in mind that taking care of your mental health is important as cliche as it sounds. If it is not feeding into your life in a good direction, then get rid of it. Sometimes it will hurt in the beginning, but it is better than carrying on something that will cause more pain or heartache in the end. You can never change someone unless they are wanting to change themselves to be a better person in the long run. I made the mistake trying to change some people in the past and it never went over well. It left me broken and lost and had me realize I am not able to control others only God has this power!